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  • Margaret Sala

Ten questions to ask yourself when you are not even sure you are ready to change




You may be contemplating therapy. Maybe there's something deep down you know needs to change, but you are not sure if you want to. Maybe you are not ready to let go of your eating disorder, your alcohol use, your smoking. Maybe you are not ready to face your anxiety, to change your sleep habits, to start exercising, to work on your relationships. It's completely okay to be ambivalent at the start of therapy, and therapy can help you work through the ambivalence. But maybe you are not even sure you are ready start therapy.


Here are some questions that you can ask yourself to help you get started in working through the ambivalence, to decide whether you are ready for change:

  1. You are here. You are thinking about therapy. What motivated you to do that in the first place?

  2. Think of a time in your life when you weren't struggling with this issue. How were things different back then?

  3. What is the best reason for changing? The three best reasons?

  4. What will your life be like if you made this change?

  5. What will your life be like if nothing changes?

  6. How would you like your life to be like a year from now? 3 years? 5 years? 10 years?

  7. Fill this out: A part of you wants to ________________, and another part of you wants to ____________________________.

  8. If you were to change, how do you think you would go about it?

  9. What is the next right thing to do, the next best step?

  10. This feel so hard right now. Can you think of another situation when you did something that felt impossible, but you found a way to do it?

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